Archive for the ‘Personal’ Category
Finding My Teaching Groove
For the past ten years at The Freeway I have only had to teach less than half the time on Sundays. We had a team of people planning most of the series we did, as well as taking the lead with speaking and facilitating discussion from week to week, etc. For instance, in 2009 (my last full year of ministry at The Freeway) I only spoke 15 times.
The reason I didn’t speak more often is two-fold, I suppose:
- We really valued having many voices teaching from the front. “Preaching for all, by all” was a motto we adopted from our friends at 614 Regent Park in Toronto. Over the years, we gave an opportunity to approximately 30 different people to try their hand at teaching. Some of them developed into super-capable teachers. Some of them were really good to begin with. Others… well.. they tried hard.
- I do not really consider myself much of a teacher. It is certainly not my primary gift. I have to work really hard at teaching, it does not come very easily or naturally for me. And, to be honest, it has been good to empower and coach others to find their voice in teaching. That’s my favourite part of leadership… giving others space to discover their gifts.
Well, in my new role at Hillside, teaching is definitely a larger part of my role. I am, after all, the “teaching pastor.” Part of the role is to establish a teaching team, but I will likely end up doing about two thirds of the teaching on Sundays… at least for the next while.
In October when I started teaching at Hillside, I did four weeks in a row… and I honestly don’t remember ever doing that before in my life. I am not used to that… and in the Fall it was a real challenge for me.
But I have to admit, I have been more and more excited about the process of teaching at this church as time goes on. It’s still a big challenge, but I don’t know, I guess I just really like this church community and I feel like teaching is contributing to the mobilization of the mission there.
Currently, we are working our way through a 15 week series in the book of Luke leading up to Easter. I am finding myself getting more and more excited each week. That’s kind of weird for me… to be excited about teaching. Maybe I am finally finding my teaching groove.
Ten Songs By Ten Artists I Love
I purchased/received a lot of great albums in 2010 by a lot of great artists. Out of all of those albums, I have selected ten of my favourites, and then chosen my favourite song/video from each one. Remember these are albums I purchased in 2010… not necessarily albums that were released in 2010 (although some were).
Choosing only ten favourites was hard… but choosing my favourite song by each was actually way harder because I could have chosen several of the songs by most of them that I absolutely love. The list is definitely not definitive.
The deal is, if you are reading this and have your own blog, you should do the same and trackback. Let’s share some love, shall we?
OK, here we go. In no particular order:
1. Weezer | Album: Ratitude | Song: “(If You’re Wondering If I Want You To) I Want You To”
2. Mumford & Sons | Album: Sigh No More |Song: “Roll Away Your Stone”
3. Herman Dune | Album: Next Year In Zion | Song: “On A Saturday”
4. Ron Sexsmith (Sexsmith & Kerr) | Album: Destination Unknown | Song: “Listen”
5. Cake | Album: Showroom of Compassion | Song: “Sick Of You”
6. Derek Webb | Album: Stockholm Syndrome | Song: “What Matters More”
7. Sufjan Stevens | Album: Age of Adz | Song: “Too Much”
8. Arcade Fire | Album: The Suburbs | Song: “The Suburbs”
9. The Weepies | Album: Be My Thrill | Song: “Please Speak Of Me”
10. David Bazan | Album: Curse Your Branches | Song: “Please Baby Please”
…and a bonus track from David Bazan: “The Man In Me”… because the song just rocks… and he’s playing the friggin’ drums with his feet.
Not A Big Fan Of The Winter Blahs
Those of you who know me well, know that I am not a big fan of February… or the dull, grey winter-time in general. I can easily get down at this time of year…. and often, I do.
And I know it’s early, but (knock on wood) this year I feel a certain sense of excitement about the next couple of months. I am not exactly sure what is causing me to feel this way. If I had to guess, perhaps it’s the new place/space I am at in my life, or the new relationships which have started in the past 6 months or so that I am really excited about, or the new projects I am currently undertaking which are very different from those of this time last year (or any other year in my life), or the unknown in-between stage we are at as a family making plans about re-locating and finding work and settling in somewhere new. Who knows?
In some ways, it feels like Spring for me. The dark clouds that followed me around somewhat in 2010 (one of the hardest year’s of my life in many ways) have lifted. I had to make big life-altering decisions last year… but I made them already and now we are on a new trajectory.
And though we’re still very much feeling some of the weight of the transition, dare I say, there is even some hope and passion and excitement and vision for the future creeping into my heart and mind. Now, that’s just crazy-talk. I find myself: daydreaming about what will be, planning what kind of a life we want to build together, thinking about the new start we get to make as a family, and hoping we can somehow make a difference in the lives of the people that we feel God is leading us to.
Well, I still don’t love winter… but Spring is becoming a state of mind.
People Have Been Asking…
“What are you up to, Goodyear, how come you never blog anymore?”
Well, remember that this Fall (until the New Year) is supposed to be somewhat of a sabbatical for me, as my family and I gear up for the next chapter of our lives… whatever that might be.
- I am working 20 hours a week at Hillside Church in London as an “interim teaching pastor.”
- I am coaching two church planters weekly.
- I am helping to facilitate a local church planting network with TrueCity.
- I am doing some web design. I currently have two clients.
- I am helping a group in Guelph get a church started.
- I have been interviewing in various denominations.
- I have been developing Cultivate Network.
- I have been speaking and teaching at various events/schools/conferences.
All of this in the midst of trying to take it easy and rest. Hmm, maybe I should re-think my schedule.
But don’t worry. I’ll blog when I can…
Fourteen Years
Fourteen years ago today I married up. My wife is the best woman I know, no question about it. We have had a whirlwind of a marriage… and we’re really just getting started.
Sometimes I can’t remember being single and not being with her… I was so different then. Other times it feels like we are still getting to know each other and things in our relationship are so new and fresh.
Either way, I am a lucky man. She makes me better… a lot better. And she makes my life a lot better too.
We have spent our entire marriage trying to build a loving, fun, safe and welcoming home… and life together. We have been both hugely successful and a miserable failure at it… but we have done it together all the way.
I could say so much more, but that would be sappy… I’ll just tell her to her face.
Excited About Life
I am genuinely excited about life these days. The adventure of “all things new” and “what could be” has been exhilarating. Sure, I have had a few moments of freaking out, worrying, being anxious… but in general, this has been really great.
For those of you who don’t know, I recently resigned from the church I started – and had been pastoring at for nine years – without much of a plan as to what is next.
I decided to lay low for the most part this Fall and figure out what it is we will do next as a family… and where.
These days I find myself daydreaming about what our life could be like… and planning how to make it happen. Dreams are good. And so are new opportunities.
Aren’t I “Mr. Bright Side” today!?!
We’ll see what tomorrow brings.
Hillside
I have taken a four-month contract (September to December) at a church in London, Ontario called Hillside. My role as one of three part-time pastoral staff members is to be the main teacher and to help with vision, mission, and teams. I am really excited about this little adventure, although I have no idea where it will lead or how it will really go. But I have met some really great people there already and I am looking forward to getting to know them more. I also like reading and learning new contexts, so I look forward to getting to know London as well. Chances are good that I will write about more of my adventures at Hillside over the next four months. They have a very intriguing and cool story as a church community.
I Am No One’s Pastor
This week it hit me like a ton of bricks… I am no one’s pastor. And I don’t mean just vocationally, I mean not at all. For the first time in 15 years I am not a pastor… and it actually feels good in a lot of ways.
My identity has, for the most part, been defined at least somewhat by my role as a pastor for almost my whole adult life. That’s good and bad, I suppose. But now I am on a bit of a new journey of discovery in some ways. I have an opportunity to discover some new things about me without the role or title or trappings of being someone’s pastor.
Geez, I hope I like what I find.
I Am Unemployed…
… for the first time in my adult life.
Sunday night our family attended our final worship gathering at the church community we moved to Hamilton to start more than nine years ago. It was a beautiful gathering with people we really love. People told stories, shared their feelings, reminisced, talked about the influence we have been in their lives, and articulated their love for our family… oh, and we ate delicious food together too. It was really humbling and incredible. They had put together a scrap book for us with photos, stories, comments, etc. from the past nine years… and gave us a gorgeous painting which had been painted by one of the adults with developmental disabilities who we work with. Needless to say, we will never forget that gathering… and we will certainly never forget The Freeway community and the impact they have had on our lives.
The thing is, I have been leading The Freeway for a quarter of my life. As can be expected, it is with very mixed emotions that I prepare for the next leg of the journey:
Excited. I am excited to explore new ways for us to live authentic, holistic, mission-shaped, Christian lives. I like new challenges. New opportunities. New chances to be creative. New beginnings. New stories to be told. I have been dreaming a lot about what type of a life / community we want to be part of / help create.
Sad. I love The Freeway community. I mean, I really love them. I have found (and been radically changed by) an amazing, supportive, authentic community of people. I also love Hamilton. I love our neighbourhood. I love what my life has been for the last decade. I am really sad to move on.
Disappointed. I am disappointed that my transition has not been nearly as smooth as it could have been. That is all I want to say about that.
Scared. Really scared. The future is still unknown. What exactly is next for us? Will we be able to accomplish what we are supposed to accomplish? What if we fail? How will this all work out? Will our kids be OK? I am worried that I won’t be good enough. I shouldn’t be worried, but I am. Stepping into the unknown both inspires me and scares the crap out of me.
Grateful. I am so thankful that I have had the opportunity to live in Hamilton, start a holistic Christian community, start a coffee house, live where I live, form the friendships I have, learn what I have learned. There are people inside and outside The Freeway, inside and outside The Salvation Army, and inside and outside this town who have shaped me… and helped me… and formed me… and took a chance on me… and let me take a chance on them. I am so grateful for the opportunities I have had and for the people I have met.
So, what’s next for us? I will be taking a bit of a break this Fall. Slowing things down, as it were. I have some speaking engagements lined up and a possible part-time job… but I am purposely taking some down time to reflect, replenish, and gear up for what’s next. And what’s that? Well, early in the new year we will begin the work of starting a new holistic Christian community.
More on that soon…
Came & Went / Wait & See
Is July seriously over!?! Where did it go?
Sorry it’s been a while since I’ve updated this space. We were away at a cottage for a week in July and then camping with The Freeway for the long weekend. All the other time in between seems to shoot by as I have had lots to do in preparation to depart from The Freeway in a few short weeks.
As for what’s next for our family? Well, that’s coming together… but for now, you’ll have to wait and see.