Archive for the ‘Family’ Category
Samantha Speaks: Episode 2.0
My twelve year old daughter, Samantha, joins me here on the blog occasionally in a feature I am calling: “Samantha Speaks.” For episode 2.0 I thought I’d feature some of her writing. At last year’s Eighth Letter Conference in Toronto, Samantha spoke alongside people like Peter Rollins, Leonard Sweet, and Shane Claiborne. Enjoy Samantha’s letter to the church in North America:
Dear Church in North America,
Jesus loves you.
I realize that I am only 12 years old. I don’t have much experience, I don’t have many answers, and I still have so many questions. But I want to share with you something that is important… and also very close to my heart.
I think one of the most important aspects of being the Church is the community we have with each other and with the world. The Church is people, not buildings and programs. It is a network of relationships. We exist within these relationships to worship God and to love one another.
Jesus says in the Bible that we are supposed to love our neighbour. I think about that a lot. So who is our neighbour? Who is my neighbour? I probably ask this question daily.
My neighbour is not just the person that lives in the house next door, or down the street (although, they are all very nice folks), but also people living across the world. It’s children suffering in Africa, children in my own city that don’t have enough to eat, people who are sick in the hospital. My neighbours are the poor. But they are also the rich, the famous; people living in big houses with important jobs. Basically, it seems, everyone is my neighbour. They are all people who God loves.
These are my neighbours. And I am supposed to love them.
Well, today for the purpose of this letter, I want you to consider your neighbour to be the people that we are in relationship with day-to-day. Those who are in our local community.
Here’s where I am coming from: In my church experience – for as long as I can remember – community has been such a major part of church. Ours is in a neighbourhood where many people are in need. Some need food, some need shelter, and some need love.
Our church worship gatherings are in the evening on Sundays. But at least an hour before the gathering officially begins people show up to hang out, catch up on each others weeks, and help set up for the gathering. At the end of the gathering people stay around for what seems like hours connecting, talking, laughing, and supporting each other. Every week after the gathering a bunch of people from church come over to our house to eat, laugh (and, when it’s on, watch ‘The Amazing Race’).
Also, we host Christmas baking parties, Thanksgiving parties, BBQs, and dinners at our house all the time. In fact, my whole life, every time I turn around, there are people over for dinner or we’ve planned a fun night out with friends.
We also have a lot of camping trips, spiritual retreats, and other expeditions with people from our community. Every day is an adventure! It seems as though our lives as a family revolve around being in community. And all of this is Church to me.
Now, according to my dad, this type of community is not necessarily normal for churches these days. That seems weird to me. But shouldn’t it be normal? Isn’t that what Jesus wants? We should care about each other. We should hang out together. We should have people in our homes often and eat with them. It just seems like that is a major ingredient to being the Church.
Why is this so important? Well, community is an important part of being a follower of Jesus, in my perspective.
Jesus was constantly in community. He was always eating and drinking with his friends, followers, and other people too. He did miracles with food and he asked us to remember him when we eat together. Jesus seemed to be about community before a lot of other things… including following all the religious rules.
Jesus was constantly healing people. He healed the sick and the crippled, those with leprosy, the blind, the mute, and plenty more. He didn’t just heal them physically, but he went way beyond that by accepting them, loving them, and forgiving them. And he asked us to do the same thing on his behalf. Acceptance and love can be such powerful things, and are a big part in showing people that God loves and cares for them.
Jesus said that the most important commandment is to “love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your strength and with all your mind and to love your neighbour as yourself.”
“Love your neighbour as yourself.” I think that what he is really saying is that we need to be in deep community with others.
How do we do that?
An important aspect of community is hospitality… which to me is about sharing. To be hospitable means to share ourselves and our resources with others… even complete strangers, warmly, lovingly, and generously. Being hospitable is doing things like: giving someone a place to stay when they need one, having someone over for dinner to get to know them better, cooking a meal for someone who is sick, or even just offering advice to a friend. But it’s also sharing what others offer us, and making a way for their offering to be more important than ours.
There’s a woman that has been part of our church community for a while. She has significant mental health issues. This woman’s hobby is making crafts. She turns everything into a craft! She makes her crafts from other people’s trash. She stitches badges on her clothes, makes buttons, and cards, and scrapbooks. Her favourite thing to do is take photos, though. She takes pictures of the most random places and people, but they turn out amazing. When this woman hands someone a homemade craft or a picture, it makes their day. I love her creativity, even though other people don’t always see its beauty. Sometimes we have to look for the beauty in other people’s offerings.
Community and hospitality should not only be about showing love to people within your church or home, although that is important, but to also reach out to those in your neighbourhood, people who really need it.
If you show hospitality to people, you are showing them that you love them and by doing that, you are showing them that God loves them too. In John 3:18, it talks about how we should love with actions instead of just words. That sounds nice. Hospitality is love. Let’s do that.
House Sold, House Bought
About a week ago, we sold our house in Hamilton after it only being on the market for 12 days. We got two offers and had to choose. What a relief.
Two days later we bought a house in London. We will be moving in mid-June. Here are some pics… let’s call them “before shots”:
Not A Big Fan Of The Winter Blahs
Those of you who know me well, know that I am not a big fan of February… or the dull, grey winter-time in general. I can easily get down at this time of year…. and often, I do.
And I know it’s early, but (knock on wood) this year I feel a certain sense of excitement about the next couple of months. I am not exactly sure what is causing me to feel this way. If I had to guess, perhaps it’s the new place/space I am at in my life, or the new relationships which have started in the past 6 months or so that I am really excited about, or the new projects I am currently undertaking which are very different from those of this time last year (or any other year in my life), or the unknown in-between stage we are at as a family making plans about re-locating and finding work and settling in somewhere new. Who knows?
In some ways, it feels like Spring for me. The dark clouds that followed me around somewhat in 2010 (one of the hardest year’s of my life in many ways) have lifted. I had to make big life-altering decisions last year… but I made them already and now we are on a new trajectory.
And though we’re still very much feeling some of the weight of the transition, dare I say, there is even some hope and passion and excitement and vision for the future creeping into my heart and mind. Now, that’s just crazy-talk. I find myself: daydreaming about what will be, planning what kind of a life we want to build together, thinking about the new start we get to make as a family, and hoping we can somehow make a difference in the lives of the people that we feel God is leading us to.
Well, I still don’t love winter… but Spring is becoming a state of mind.
Coaching Basketball & Life Transition
I am coaching grade six and seven girls basketball at my kids school this year, and it is proving to be a whole lot of fun. My daughter, Samantha (who now has a Twitter account), is on the team. We have won our first two games of the season so far. Nice work. The girls on the team are amazing… absolutely great kids.
Coaching the team has reminded me how much I love the sport of basketball… and it has reminded me how much I love kids. Having worked at camps and having been a youth pastor for the better part of a decade, I have spent my fair share of time leading stupid games, going to crazy places, planning weekends away, watching school sports, and just generally trying to create formative experiences and relationships with young people.
Watching my pre-teen become a young woman reminds me how hard it is to be a teenager these days… and how different the world is even than when I was a kid. The world is a crazy place. And as our family begins the process of moving to another town (I have accepted a job as teaching pastor at Hillside Church in London, Ontario) I am pretty anxious about what that will mean for my kids.
More on that soon…
People Have Been Asking…
“What are you up to, Goodyear, how come you never blog anymore?”
Well, remember that this Fall (until the New Year) is supposed to be somewhat of a sabbatical for me, as my family and I gear up for the next chapter of our lives… whatever that might be.
- I am working 20 hours a week at Hillside Church in London as an “interim teaching pastor.”
- I am coaching two church planters weekly.
- I am helping to facilitate a local church planting network with TrueCity.
- I am doing some web design. I currently have two clients.
- I am helping a group in Guelph get a church started.
- I have been interviewing in various denominations.
- I have been developing Cultivate Network.
- I have been speaking and teaching at various events/schools/conferences.
All of this in the midst of trying to take it easy and rest. Hmm, maybe I should re-think my schedule.
But don’t worry. I’ll blog when I can…
Eighth Letter
Tomorrow, my twelve year old daughter, Samantha, is speaking at a conference called Eighth Letter in Toronto, alongside: Shane Claiborne, Ron Sider, Walter Brueggemann, Pete Rollins, and many more.
To say I am proud of her would be an understatement of grand proportions. She is brilliant and articulate and will, no doubt, do an incredible job.
Fourteen Years
Fourteen years ago today I married up. My wife is the best woman I know, no question about it. We have had a whirlwind of a marriage… and we’re really just getting started.
Sometimes I can’t remember being single and not being with her… I was so different then. Other times it feels like we are still getting to know each other and things in our relationship are so new and fresh.
Either way, I am a lucky man. She makes me better… a lot better. And she makes my life a lot better too.
We have spent our entire marriage trying to build a loving, fun, safe and welcoming home… and life together. We have been both hugely successful and a miserable failure at it… but we have done it together all the way.
I could say so much more, but that would be sappy… I’ll just tell her to her face.
Pleasant Surprises & No Surprises
One of the interesting things that has happened during this transition phase I find myself in currently – and something I have been surprised by – is that certain people who I wouldn’t have expected to, have been very supportive of what I am going through. Equally surprising are the folks who I haven’t heard anything from… but let’s go with the positive flow for now, shall we?
Thanks so much for the phone calls, emails, Facebook messages, face-to-face conversations, and letters. I really appreciate my network of friends and family. I have needed to rely on you and your words and encouragement and thoughts and prayers recently. Thank you. The amount of people who have “spoken up” with words of encouragement and have tried to help me process where I am at and what I need to do in this process of re-discovering who I am and what I am supposed to do and be, and the amount of people who have offered support, advice and advocacy has literally blown me away.
Thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
Not too surprising has been the support of my beautiful wife, Margie. She is honestly amazing. Truly my partner in this life. I would amount to virtually nothing in this world if it were not for her and her love for me. This has been an especially hard time on her… but she continues to support, encourage, advocate, inspire and love me. Being “in it together” has made such a huge difference. I love the little Maggot!
Community & Yard Work As Therapy
Friday and Saturday we had a sleep-over party with some good friends. We were supposed to go camping this weekend, but because the forecast was calling for crappy weather, we opted not to go… kind of last minute. We went to the drive-in movies on Friday night, they all slept at our house that night, and then on Saturday we headed to St. Jacobs to the farmers’ market for the day, followed by some games and a terrific meal with meat and vegetables purchased at the market.
Today, Margie and I did a ton of yard work, garage cleaning and gardening. We are achey and exhausted now. But at the same time, it feels so great to have been outside working with our hands. The sun was shining all day and it was great to work on something together. We make a pretty good team.
All in all, this weekend’s activities has been a much-needed distraction from what is otherwise a pretty stressful, busy time in our lives. Tomorrow we are planning some fun stuff as a family. It will be really good to have the extra day off to relax and enjoy each other.
Thank you and happy birthday, Queen Victoria.
Not So Much
We had our real estate agent come to our house yesterday to assess what we would need to get done to put our house on the market and to tell us what he thinks we might be able to list it at, should we choose to (or have to). Hopefully, all of that is “just in case” as we really love this city, this neighbourhood, this house… but we would rather be prepared with plan A, B, C and D in light of the imminent end of my employment in a couple months.
It’s weird what your mind and emotions do during transitions like this. One minute you can be truly hopeful, excited and peaceful. And then the next minute you can feel lost, nervous, scared, and sad. I think I may have experienced all of those at some point yesterday. Reality set in a bit as we considered even the possibility that this wouldn’t be our home anymore.
That’s huge.
I am sure when all of this unfolds the way it is supposed to, I will look back and appreciate this journey… but right now, not so much.








