Be Generously Hospitable
Thursday, March 22, 2007
A couple days ago I gave some suggestions of things folks in our community at The Freeway could do to help the community continue to become more of a missional presence in our neck of the woods and help curb the "us and them", "in and out" dividing line in the community [cliques]. I did so in a post called, The Freeway Is Becoming Institution-y.
I would like the opportunity to elaborate further as I think some folks got the wrong impression, and also because perhaps these thoughts could benefit communities elsewhere as these issues are certainly not unique to us. Keep in mind, these are only suggestions. I do not expect everyone in our our community to do all of these... though that would be great. I think these are all really important in the shaping of things to come. That does not mean that if you don't do these you will somehow not be included in our community [of course not], but if we are to be serious about creating missional community and not just establishing another churchy church to attend, we all must think these through and make adjustments as Jesus leads us individually and as a community.
The four suggestions were:
Hang out with and be generously hospitable to those on the fringe of the community, and those who you wouldn't normally associate with.
We have been talking about and exploring this idea for some time at The Freeway. This is not an "out of the blue" idea for us. For five years we have been "beating this horse" and have made huge strides in terms of seeing deep community with a diverse community come to fruition [although we sometimes don't see it - forest for the trees?].
Granted, human nature is to stick with those who we have affinity with or who are like us [age, culture, socio-economic status, interests, etc.], but that is simply not the Kingdom Way. The Kingdom Way welcomes the stranger. The Kingdom Way cares ridiculously for those who Jesus places in our path. The Kingdom Way levels the playing field so that we are all brothers and sisters, and therefore need to love each other generously. the Kingdom Way sees no "us and them."
How? Start off simple: Sit and talk with someone new. Engage in conversation. Accept their quirks. Hear their story... it will change you. Invite someone new over for dinner. Invite yourself over to someone's house you haven't been to. Have coffee/tea with someone new. When you are going out for food, ensure you include people regardless of whether they have enough money to go.
Don't wait to be invited into someone's life. Invade their space with friendship and hospitality. Look for those who are excluded, and include them. Make a way... in fact, bend over backwards for them to be involved.
And hey, when you are feeling like you are being excluded or shunned, like you are on the fringe, if you have the where-with-all, speak up. We have to help each other learn to love each other better. It will be messy and hard, but necessary. We must inspire each other to love more. No one can apologize for - and subsequently learn from - something they don't know they did worng. Allow people to become better.
Our community must continue to be about creating a safe space for people to engage in deep community. No more superficial bull crap. No more individualized consumerism. No more thinking only about ourselves in a self-centered way. We have to engage with Jesus and learn how he interacts with people... all people... and incarnate that as a community.
I would like the opportunity to elaborate further as I think some folks got the wrong impression, and also because perhaps these thoughts could benefit communities elsewhere as these issues are certainly not unique to us. Keep in mind, these are only suggestions. I do not expect everyone in our our community to do all of these... though that would be great. I think these are all really important in the shaping of things to come. That does not mean that if you don't do these you will somehow not be included in our community [of course not], but if we are to be serious about creating missional community and not just establishing another churchy church to attend, we all must think these through and make adjustments as Jesus leads us individually and as a community.
The four suggestions were:
- Hang out with and be generously hospitable to those on the fringe of the community, and those who you wouldn't normally associate with.
- Be present more.
- Consider being involved in our guiding / coaching / mentoring initiative... or adding another person to your network if you are already involved.
- Move closer.
Hang out with and be generously hospitable to those on the fringe of the community, and those who you wouldn't normally associate with.
We have been talking about and exploring this idea for some time at The Freeway. This is not an "out of the blue" idea for us. For five years we have been "beating this horse" and have made huge strides in terms of seeing deep community with a diverse community come to fruition [although we sometimes don't see it - forest for the trees?].
Granted, human nature is to stick with those who we have affinity with or who are like us [age, culture, socio-economic status, interests, etc.], but that is simply not the Kingdom Way. The Kingdom Way welcomes the stranger. The Kingdom Way cares ridiculously for those who Jesus places in our path. The Kingdom Way levels the playing field so that we are all brothers and sisters, and therefore need to love each other generously. the Kingdom Way sees no "us and them."
How? Start off simple: Sit and talk with someone new. Engage in conversation. Accept their quirks. Hear their story... it will change you. Invite someone new over for dinner. Invite yourself over to someone's house you haven't been to. Have coffee/tea with someone new. When you are going out for food, ensure you include people regardless of whether they have enough money to go.
Don't wait to be invited into someone's life. Invade their space with friendship and hospitality. Look for those who are excluded, and include them. Make a way... in fact, bend over backwards for them to be involved.
And hey, when you are feeling like you are being excluded or shunned, like you are on the fringe, if you have the where-with-all, speak up. We have to help each other learn to love each other better. It will be messy and hard, but necessary. We must inspire each other to love more. No one can apologize for - and subsequently learn from - something they don't know they did worng. Allow people to become better.
Our community must continue to be about creating a safe space for people to engage in deep community. No more superficial bull crap. No more individualized consumerism. No more thinking only about ourselves in a self-centered way. We have to engage with Jesus and learn how he interacts with people... all people... and incarnate that as a community.
Labels: community, leadership, the freeway, writing
4:51 PM
You make a lot of inetersting comments. I think if you are feeling shunned or excluded, the blame would lie more with self than with community.
I would also say that many people may very well feel threatened by others invading space. Despite the best of intentions I would advise a more cautious and timed invasion. Depending on the personalities involved.
Just a thought.